Bend over for Donnie’s Incredible Golden Screw

Yes, I know, our Orange Overlord’s making an emperor-sized assh*le of himself on his (likely last ever) Asian junket. Yes, I just heard about the horrible gun spree in the church in Texas. I’ll get to harping on those as time and opportunity permits.

In the mean time… You don’t have to be an economics major to figure out the trickle-down economy being proffered by Donnie Doublescoops and his fellow bilkers favors the top Oink Percent and makes the rest of us great unwashed chumps so much Soylent Green. Haven’t we seen this dreadful horror movie before, back in the 80s, under Ronald Reagan? Reaganomics didn’t work; it exploded deficits and the national debt and provoked TWO recessions. The money promised from that Republican Ayn Rand flavored Ponzi scheme never materialized in the economy, unless you were a yacht builder or something, or lived in Grand Cayman and worked for an investment bank. Anyone fooled by this scam deserves to starve in a back alley refrigerator box. Yes, really.

And speaking of starving, John Schnatter, the Trump-supporting Papa John’s “Pizza” CEO who bitched about Obamacare forcing him to jack the costs of his purported foodstuff to his customers and who would happily pay his minions in day-old pepperoni (in lieu of actual wages) to prepare and deliver his company’s greasy plastic garbage to his insipid customers had the balls to bitch about those nasty ol’ uppity NFL players who protested racial inequality and police brutality by kneeling for our anthem, because somehow it was ruining his sales of what he boasts is the “official pizza* of the NFL.”

Yeah, well… To quote the constable from the Monty Python “Spring Surprise” skit, “Fuck your sales!” I’ve had better pizza from a bowling alley cafe (yes, really) than any miserable mishap Schnatter labels a pizza. Ya think maybe his inferior ingredients, inferior pizza and his rancid right-wing politics might have an undue effect on his precious profits?

Hey, Schnatter… You’re almost as stupid as Energy Dept. Secretary Rick “Oops” Perry and his fossil-fuel-will-prevent-sexual-assault argument. No anchovies, please.

John Pierce
Starving cartoonist sans portfolio. Native Angeleno but I'll be mellow when I dead (thanks, Al Yankovic). I live to bully bullies!